floralfires

it’s the last day of school tomorrow and everyone’s going to the meadow to get drunk and celebrate and guess what……

i’ll be at home on my own sitting inside again. bit of an anti climax considering it’s kinda the end of an era. the 5 years at high school hasn’t been the easiest, but there’s always been amazing people that i’ve been honoured to meet and call friends. soppy, i know haha.

aw jeez i’m gonna cry tomorrow. 

we are just misguided ghosts..

it’s my last week of school and i still don’t fit in with a group of people. i guess there must be something wrong with me but idk..

sure i have friends but i don’t know how to be a good person and i always mess up and i must annoy them so much they probably don’t even like me.

i just really, really want someone or something stable and i want to be completely happy. i haven’t been this down in so long. i want someone who won’t go away like everyone else did and someone who will make me happy and that’s all i need. 

i know that i must sound like a whiny brat but please, please, please let me get what i want. lord knows it would be the first time.

(see how i incorporated the smiths into that)

anyway, i must keep going wrong. i’ve lost my best friend, i’ve falled out with friends, i’m never usually myself when i’m around my other friends. maybe when i go into sixth form things will be different and i’ll make new friends but aw man i’m so awkward and get so so so anxious at meeting new people. i figured i have to change some thing rather than sit here and complain about everything..not that anyone reads these but i guess it helps to write stuff down.

oh and my brother is moving to Australia on the 10th. i’m probably not going to see him again, and that kinda hurts. 

i just fail at life really..